Jackpot! Page 19

Once outside the bar, Drew offered the first cab that stopped to Danny and Courtney. I kissed my brother on the cheek, and then came the shocker; Courtney was hugging me hard.

  “I’m so glad we ran into you guys!” she exclaimed, “I had so much fun!”

  Being extremely tired and drunk, I said, “You too.” I immediately regretted the response since there was so much more I wanted to say to my brother’s girlfriend. The whole cab ride home, all I could talk about was my very lame choice of words.

  “I can’t believe I couldn’t come up with something better!” I complained to Drew, “I’m a screenwriter for God’s sake!”

  “Don’t worry about it,” he said with a laugh, “You were fine.”

  “I wanted to tell Courtney how much I liked her, and how great it was to see Danny with someone so smart and so sweet and so into him. I wanted to tell her that I considered her a friend, and that I respected her and admired her.”

  “You can tell her all that,” said Drew, “Why don’t you call her tomorrow?”

  “Yeah,” I said with a drunk smile, “I think I will.”

  Then I put my head on my boyfriend’s shoulder and fell asleep until the cab pulled up to my building.

  We staggered inside and then up to my apartment, and the second I opened the door I made a mad dash for the couch.

  “Come on,” Drew said, picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder, “Let’s go to bed.”

  That’s the last thing I remember. I must have fallen asleep upside down while being carried into my bedroom.

  Chapter 33

  I woke up early the next morning, still in my clothes. Next to me was Drew, still in his clothes. Our shoes were off. My head was pounding. I tried to recall how I ended up this way. Bits and pieces of the previous night were floating around in my head.

  Monica was pregnant, Danny was carrying around a picture of him and dad, I was eating sushi, I was chugging sake, Drew and I were talking about Larry, we were eating fried bananas, I was staring at the beautiful baby, Courtney was dancing like Sean Kingston, Drew’s biceps were looking good, Courtney was hugging me good-bye, I was making a b-line for my couch. And now, I was here, in my clothes with a horrendous hangover.

  It had been a great night, though, worth every pain I felt. I was in love. Danny was in love. Danny liked the guy I loved. And I loved the girl he loved. And then I remembered the dark cloud looming over everything, which was that I still needed to talk to Drew. Until he knew the truth, what we had wasn’t real. And even though the thought of that was making my head pound harder, it was a conversation that desperately, matter-of-factly had to take place.

  “Let me guess. You have a headache,” were the first words out of Drew’s mouth. Before I could respond, he started taking off my shirt and kissing my neck.

  At this moment, the ovulation kit popped into my head and I realized I probably wasn’t ovulating anymore, but I didn’t care. I loved this man, and I wanted him, just for him, not for a baby. It was over for me. I was surrendering to love, and my days of manipulation and con games were behind me. I would have to tell Frankie when she got back that I was done with her contract and her scheme. I was in love. And yes, indirectly she’d had something to do with that, but her bribe had been wrong. Very wrong. And I had been wrong for ever considering it.

  “You know, something really interesting happened last night,” Drew said softly in between kisses, “We actually slept together and didn’t sleep together.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “It just means that we were actually able to enjoy each other without sex. It’s cool that we just cuddled and didn’t actually fool around. You know something? We might actually end up getting married and having like five kids together.”

  I couldn’t take it anymore. This was just too much. The guilt had finally overtaken my soul. I had to tell him the truth this instant. “Drew, I can’t do this anymore. I have to tell you something.”

  “Oh my God!” he exclaimed, “You’re pregnant, aren’t you? I should have known!”

  “Drew…”

  “You were acting so weird last night, and when you saw that baby in the stroller… Now I get it!”

  I suddenly felt like someone just flushed the toilet and I was going down it. “Drew, stop.”

  “Oh my God! Why were you drinking last night?”

  I grabbed his shoulders. “Listen to me. I AM NOT pregnant.”

  “You’re not?” he asked. I wasn’t sure if he was relieved or disappointed.

  “Actually, I don’t know. Maybe I could be, but it would be really early on, and drinking wouldn’t matter at this point…I don’t think…”

  “But you might be pregnant?”

  I put my head down in shame. Then I took a deep breath and mustered up all the courage I had. “Look, I’ve been trying to conceive a child since the first time we slept together. It has to do with my mother’s lottery winnings. A few weeks ago, she gave Danny and I a contract that stated if either of us had a baby in the next year, she’d give us eight million dollars.”

  As I spoke, I could detect three things on Drew’s face; shock, disgust and sadness. I found it interesting that I could actually see all those emotions in one look. I figured this must have been the same look he had on his face when he found out about his dad and Monica.

  “So I went out with you,” I continued, “and I slept with you in hopes of having your baby.”

  The movie, The Blair Witch Project actually caused me to both throw up and to acquire insomnia. At this moment, if I had the choice of seeing it again or seeing Drew’s reaction, I would gladly have picked the movie in a heartbeat.

  When he responded, his voice was cold, unemotional and distant. “So you basically used me.”

  I put my head down. “Yes.”

  “You pretended to be attracted to me and to care about me and listen to my stories.”

  “No, that’s not true.”

  “The dinner at Soldier Field, all the dates we had, the other day in the equipment room, and that night…that night you told me you loved me.”

  “I know,” I said softly.

  Now his voice rose. “I trusted you! I told you things!” he shouted, “About my dad, and about how I felt, and about everything!”

  “Drew please let me explain,” I pleaded.

  He got up and was now hurriedly looking for his socks and shoes.

  “It was so wrong. I’m really sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you. I was desperate.”

  “Yeah, you must have been,” he shouted, “And now, I can only think of one word for you.” He stopped shouting and stood there for a moment. I waited for the word. He looked up at me with a frosty stare that literally made me shiver. And then he said softly, “evil,” and headed for the door.

  I went running after him and literally chased him into the hallway by the elevators.

  “Drew, I’m not evil. You know me,” I pleaded, “All those dates and all the times we made love…”

  “We didn’t make love,” he snapped, “You used me for sex.” He pressed the elevator button.

  “That’s not true!” I wasn’t sure if I was lying or telling the truth. I was and I wasn’t.

  “It’s not true? Can you honestly say that every time we were together it was because you wanted to be with me?”

  “I don’t know when the turning point was, but on one of those dates I fell in love with you.”

  The elevator door arrived and Drew got in. He held the open door button and said sadly, “With the way our relationship began, with the lying and the using, there’s no way it can work.” And with those words, the elevator doors closed. I stood there in my hallway and began to sob.

  Chapter 34

  I sat on the edge of the bed and I watched her sleep. She was beautiful. Physically beautiful, yes, but so much more. My heart started to pound because I knew what I had to do, what I had to SAY actually.

  “What are you doing?” Courtney whispered when she woke up.
/>   “Watching you,” I smiled.

  “I feel awful,” she giggled. Then she started to get up.

  “Where are you going?”

  “Bathroom.”

  “Wait,” I said, gently taking her arm.

  She smiled. “What?”

  I drew in a deep breath. “Yesterday I told you, you got me.”

  “Yeah,” she smiled, “I remember.”

  “What I should have said was that I love you.”

  I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone start crying that quickly. “I love you, too,” she said through tears.

  I said softly, “You got me.”

  “Yeah, I got you,” she said with a smile.

  We hugged for literally ten minutes. I just sat on the bed holding her, and it was amazing. I was such a softie now. Between wanting to make amends with my mother, making friends with my sister’s boyfriend, and being in love, I was like one of those guys I always made fun of, one of those guys I always referred to as “whipped” or “wimpy” or “like a dog on a leash.” The funny part was, I loved it!

  I started to lift my old basketball jersey over Courtney’s head when my cell phone rang.

  “Sorry, this may be Vito,” I said, scrambling to find my phone in my jacket pocket, “I think I might be working today.” I finally found it and saw it was my sister.

  “Hey, Jamie,” I answered.

  “Hi,” she said. I could tell immediately that she was crying. Rarely had I seen or heard my sister upset, so whatever was troubling her, I knew it was probably a big deal.

  “What’s wrong?”

  She began telling me the whole Drew saga, while I mouthed to Courtney, “Sorry, she’s crying…”

  Courtney nodded, “I’m going to make coffee,” she whispered.

  I gave her a thumbs-up, while continuing to listen to the awful details Jamie was sharing.

  Her story took about a minute and a half to tell, and when she was finished she said, “What should I do?” like she wanted me, her big brother to fix it.

  “Look, don’t worry about it,” I began, “Just try to work it out with him. He’s a great guy. I really like him. Let yourself be happy. I mean, look at me. I’m with Courtney now and obviously baby-making with her isn’t going to happen.” I lay back down on the bed and looked up at the ceiling, as I continued. “And trust me, I have zero interest in getting arrested again, trying to pick up a woman to have my baby, nor do I feel like calling any other old girlfriends to have sex with, so I can get Ma’s money.”

  “What?” I heard next.

  I quickly sat up and saw Courtney standing in the doorway. She was holding an empty coffee pot.

  “Let me call you back,” I said into the phone. Then I snapped it shut. “Courtney…”

  “So you got arrested picking up a women to have sex with? Interesting…”

  She turned around and stormed into the kitchen. I followed closely behind. I could tell she was trying to stay calm, but I knew she was pissed beyond belief.

  “Look,” I scrambled, “My mother bribed us. She told us she’d give us eight million dollars if we gave her a grandchild. What was I supposed to do?”

  “Oh, that justifies everything!” she shouted with sarcasm.

  “Hear me out, please? She gave Jamie and I a contract. We have a year to have a child…”

  “I’m sickened! How could you even consider having kids for money?”

  “Well, it’s not just money. It’s eight million dollars.”

  “I don’t care if it’s eight BILLION!” she shouted, “It’s wrong! You would actually create a life solely to profit financially?”

  “It wouldn’t have to be that way. I would do my best to be a good dad. But that’s not even the point. The thing is…I met YOU, and…”

  Courtney let out a bitter laugh. “Huh! That’s the funniest part! You met me, the girl who can’t have kids! Oh my God! That’s why you broke up with me, isn’t it?”

  “Uh…”

  “What the hell were you thinking?”

  “I was thinking that I realized I was in love with you. That’s why I came to see you and get back together. Don’t you understand?! I don’t care about the money anymore!”

  “But before you figured that out, you had to go around and screw a bunch of women!”

  “No! I swear, I didn’t sleep with any of them!”

  Tears were running down her cheeks. “I wish I could believe you.”

  “Please…” I walked over to her and tried to hold her, but she pushed me away.

  “No! Don’t touch me. You make me sick! You AND your sister. She’s using that poor guy, Drew. Isn’t she?”

  “Courtney, you have to believe me…”

  “I don’t believe anything you say. You’re a liar. Get out of my apartment!”

  I went back into the bedroom and got dressed. A minute later I was back in the kitchen. Courtney had stopped crying and was putting some dishes in the dishwasher. She refused to look up.

  “Courtney, I love you. I mean it. I don’t want the money. I just want you.” I actually felt tears well in my eyes. “You got me, remember?” I whispered.

  Courtney looked up at me, her eyes filled with anger. “I don’t want you.”

  “Really?”

  “The clock’s ticking. You better go sleep with some more girls.”

  Now I knew I’d lost. I put my head down in shame and left without saying another word.

  Chapter 35

  After I got off the phone with Danny, I found myself beyond depressed. Not only had I lost Drew, but I’d also probably caused the demise of my brother and the woman he loved. I wished so much that I could take back that fateful phone call, but what was done was done, and I had to live with it.

  I spent the day in front of the TV, eating as much junk food as I possibly could without throwing up. While watching Pretty In Pink, I devoured a bag of O’Keedokee cheese popcorn. I managed to eat a pint of Ben and Jerry’s Chubby Hubby, while flipping back and forth from The Shawshank Redemption to E! channel’s Top 100 Celebrity Break-ups. I also finished off some left over pizza, while watching Sex and the City re-runs. I was using food to comfort and soothe my anxiety and depression, but it wasn’t working. All it did was make me feel bloated and sick. Somewhere between when Andy Dufrane crawled through the sewer to escape Shawshank, and the break up between Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt, Danny called.

  “Are you mad at me?” was the first thing I asked him after we said hello.

  “No,” he replied, “It was my fault for talking when I knew she was in the next room.”

  “Still, I’m really sorry. What happened?”

  “It’s pretty bad. I can’t talk about it.”

  I heard street noise in the background and I knew Danny was on his cell. “Are you working?”

  “Yup. Pretzel boy’s handing out samples.”

  “Danny, why don’t you quit that job? You hate it.”

  “I need the money.”

  In the background, I heard a guy shout, “Off the phone! We’re losing business!”

  “Plus, I love the guy I work for,” Danny joked, “He’s so inspiring.”

  Danny quickly told me about Courtney’s reaction to hearing about Ma’s contract. I felt horrible for my brother because I knew he was hurting, and the guilt I felt for being the cause was semi-unbearable.

  “How are you?” he asked me.

  “We don’t have to talk about me. I know you have a lot on your mind.”

  “Ma really screwed things up for us, didn’t she?” he asked.

  “Did she?” I asked.

  “Yes!”

  “Think about it, Danny. She did and she didn’t. It’s because of her that I’m with Drew. Or I should say…was with Drew.”

  “That’s true, but Ma didn’t do me any favors in this whole deal. Because of her, I blew it with Courtney, plus I now have legal issues.”

  “I know, but maybe Frankie did something for you, too. Think about it. Wi
thout meaning to, she sort of forced you to make a choice between money and love. And you chose love. You should feel really good about that.”

  “Maybe you’re right. Still, the girl I’m in love with wants nothing to do with me.”

  “Give her time. She’ll realize what a great guy you are. I know it.”

  “Thanks, Sis. You do the same.”

  “I’ll try. But, you know, he called me evil! Maybe I am.”

  “You’re not evil. I promise.”

  I wanted to believe my big brother but it was hard. The more I reflected, the more I realized how unethical and appalling my behavior had been for such a long time. I thought about Max. Yes, he had his flaws, but the poor guy wanted to marry me and I was going to get back together with him for the sole purpose of having a child for money. We’d most likely have found ourselves in a terrible marriage, and some poor, sweet, little child would have had to live in a turbulent, unhappy household. How could I have even considered that scenario?

  I wanted to blame my mother for everything, but how could I? She wasn’t responsible for all those nights I used Drew. Frankie didn’t plan and scheme and dress seductively to trick an innocent guy into having a child. I did that all by myself. So I was the only one to blame. And the more I thought about things, the angrier I became. Yes, I was angry at my mother, but so much more upset with myself. I went to bed angry, and the next morning I woke up angry.

  It was Monday morning. I got ready for work in my usual manner, however, I did wear my loosest suit because I couldn’t have felt any fatter. The second I left my place, I was a complete bitch to every person I came in contact with. I yelled at my cab driver for turning down the wrong street, I told the Starbucks guy who made my Grande skim, half-calf, half-decaf, no-foam latte that there was in fact a little bit of foam in it, and once inside the elevator of my office building, I purposely closed the elevator door before a sweet little old man was about to get on. And all that happened before I even got into work.

  When I walked into WGB, I didn’t say hello or say hello back to a single person. I thought it was kind of funny how most people didn’t even notice that I wasn’t saying hi. I retreated to my office, praying that on the way I wouldn’t run into my now ex-boyfriend, who thought I was evil.